Sunday, August 2, 2020

Living Bhagavad Gita 025: As the Inner Journey Begins


A series of short articles on the Bhagavad Gita for people living and working in our volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous times filled with stress and fear. This scripture born in a battlefield teaches us how to face our challenges, live our life fully, achieve excellence in whatever we do and find happiness, peace and contentment.

 [Continued from the previous post]

 

CHAPTER 2: INTRODUCTION

The Upanishads are among the world’s rarest jewels of wisdom. While other cultures have produced wisdom books, no other culture in the world has given us anything like the Upanishads, those books of highest wisdom to which the authors refused to add their names. The rishis who gave us these treasure chests said that they did not write them, they just came through them, they were mere channels for them and are not their authors, not their sources, they are not born of their brains. They said the Upanishads are apaurusheya – come from a world far beyond that of men. That refusal to give their names to their works too is part of the wisdom of their authors, for how can Krishna’s flute claim it produced Krishna’s music? It was just a channel for his music, an empty reed through which his breath flowed out as divine music the like of which the earth has never heard, to hear which ancient sages rich in asceticism took birth as cowherd women of Vrindavan.

And the Bhagavad Gita is the soul of the Upanishads, their most precious essence. There are a group of Sanskrit verses called Gita dhyana shlokas, meditation verses on the Gita, traditionally chanted before any study of the scripture. I remember chanting them before each of the hundreds of classes I had in the gurukula when I studied the Gita under my gurus, experiencing as I chanted them a deep serenity of the mind that is a requirement for understanding Krishna’s teachings. One of these verses says:

sarvopanishado gavo dogdhaa gopaalanandanah;

paartho vatsah sudheer bhokthaa dugdham gitaamrtam mahat.

“The Upanishads are cows and the son of the cowherd, Krishna, is the milkman. Arjuna is the calf and men of purified intellect are those who get to drink the milk. And the supreme nectar called the Gita is the milk.”

The Gita is also the confluence of all the innumerable streams of the rich Indian thought. Over millennia India developed countless paths to the Supreme, for awakening and experiencing our essential nature, for what is called self-realization or God-realization. We developed ways of living that led to growing within us the qualities required to walk this path: qualities like inner purity, fearlessness, readiness to surrender to the higher, straightforwardness, self-mastery, mastery over the senses, detachment, love for solitude and so on. We developed scores of paths to climb the mount of self-realization. And the Bhagavad Gita is a confluence of all these paths and all those ways of living. As innumerable rivers flow into the ocean to lose their separate identities in it, so do all streams of Indian thought and ways of spiritual living flow into the Gita and become one with it.

 

SOME GREAT MINDS ON THE GITA

Speaking of the Gita, Henry David Thoreau of Walden fame who was in awe of the scripture said, "In the morning I bathe my intellect in the stupendous and cosmogonal philosophy of the Bhagavad Gita, in comparison with which our modern world and its literature seem puny and trivial.”

Mahatma Gandhi said that when doubts haunted him, when disappointments stared him in the face, and when he saw not one ray of hope in the horizon, he turned to Bhagavad Gita and always found a verse to comfort him and he began to smile in the midst of overwhelming sorrow.   

"I owed a magnificent day to the Bhagavad Gita,” said Emerson. “It was the first of books; it was as if an empire spoke to us, nothing small or unworthy, but large, serene, consistent, the voice of an old intelligence which in another age and climate had pondered and thus disposed of the same questions which exercise us… The Bhagavad-Gita is an empire of thought.”  

 

GITA AS KRISHNA’S HEART

There is a Sanskrit line in which Krishna tells Arjuna that the Gita is his heart – geeta me hrdayam paartha.  The Gita, as Krishna says, is truly his heart, that is what he lived all his life. In some cultures we have philosophers who do not feel any need to live what they teach – Rousseau for instance. It is difficult to imagine anyone who has done more good to children, such were his ideas on education that became the power behind modern naturalism in education. What education today is to a large extent what he made it. And yet he left his own children uncared for on the streets. But in the east the belief has always been that a philosopher should live what he teaches. So the rishis of ours lived what they taught – whether it is Gautama, Kanada, Patanjali, Vyasa, Yajnavalkya, Agastya, Lopamudra, Sulabha or whoever. Krishna too lived exactly what he taught. He never taught anything that he himself did not live, nor did he ever live anything that he did not teach. His teachings and his life – he and his teachings – were the same. So to understand the Gita perhaps the best way is to study Krishna’s life.

Krishna’s lived one of the most active lives known to us. He was at the center of all the political activities that happened in his days. Rulers in his days had become deeply corrupt, there was an evil conglomerate consisting of such rulers as Jarasandha, Kamsa, Duryodhana, Paundraka Vasudeva, Kashiraja, Shalva, Shishupala and Kala Yavana who believed in power for the sake of power with no commitment to the people. Krishna wanted to create a climate in which rulers will rule for the good of the people inspired by the ancient wisdom that a ruler should be like a pregnant woman who ignores herself and her interests and lives for the good of the baby in her womb. He wanted kings to ignore their personal interests and live for the good of the people in the spirit of sacrifice. In fact, from Krishna’s standpoint the purpose of the Mahabharata war was to dethrone Duryodhana who believed in the philosophy of power for the sake of power and have in his place Yudhishthira who believed that a king should live to serve the people – something like the servant leadership model we speak about today.

Krishna sang and danced throughout his life in spite of constant threats to his life and other difficulties that surrounded him all his life. He is always a complete master of himself, living life fully, with the spirit of festivity, with his wives and friends. We cannot imagine Krishna without a smile on his lips. Both the Mahabharata and the Harivamsha, which is considered an appendix to the Mahabharata or its nineteenth chapter, show us Krishna offering elaborate, festive parties to his people. Even when his friend Arjuna is overwhelmed by the Mahabharata war situation as he stands between the two armies and watches those who have come to do the battle risking their lives, the smile on Krishna’s face never fades. The first words of his teachings in the Gita are Gita wants us to live us in the same spirit – in the spirit of festivity and celebration.

The Bhagavad Gita is Krishna’s teachings to Arjuna, as we all know. But it has been a wisdom guide to all humanity for the last more than five thousand years [according to Indian understanding, the Mahabharata War took place in 3102 BCE and the Gita was, of course, born on the first day of the war.] and is going to remain so for a long, long time to come. In that sense, the teachings of the Gita are actually given to us. Arjuna is only a nimitta, a medium, through which the teachings are given to us. The Gita is thus Krishna teaching us how to live our life meaningfully, joyously.

Though born in a battlefield, the Gita is not about the art of war. Throughout the Gita Arjuna asks Krishna questions – questions about all kind of things. He asks a large number of questions, but not one of them about the art of war. His questions are all about the art of living.

And as a book teaching us the art of living, it is a complete book. While there is no harm in reading other books – I love reading, am a voracious reader who read for several hours every day – the Gita is a complete book on the art of living. There is nothing that it does not teach us, including what food to eat, how to respond to situations, how to understand people, how to understand ourselves, how to master our mind with all its passions and so on. These are exactly the kind of questions my students ask me in the different business schools where I teach. Right now I am teaching a course in Indian Institute of Management, Lucknow and the questions Arjuna asks Krishna are no different from the questions my students there ask me. Yesterday, for instance, a student asked me how he can live consciously throughout the day rather than a few moments now and then.

 

CHALLENGES IN UNDERSTANDING THE GITA

I remember my youngest sister asking me many years ago why the Gita is difficult to understand, unlike some other religious books that are comparatively so easy. One of the many reasons why is Gita’s simplicity. The Gita tells the truth without beating about the bush, tells us straight forward how to reach the ultimate goal of our life, without ever indulging in pep talk. It does not treat us as children incapable of understanding higher truths. And it talks about reaching our goals now – while we are alive, not after our death. It tells us do this and this will happen. In that sense there is no place for belief in the Gita. There is nothing in the entire teachings of the Gita that you cannot experience here and now, provided you do the right kind of things with the right frame of mind.

So that is one challenge in understanding the Gita. Another is that it was produced by a culture that was philosophically highly advanced, far more advanced than we are, a culture for which enquiries into the meaning of life and the nature of the world were far more central than they are to us, a culture in which advanced philosophical terms were part of the common man’s everyday speech. 

Speaking of Indian Philosophy, E. W. F. Tomlin has this to say on the subtleties of Indian Thought in his book on the history of eastern philosophy: “The philosophical terms [in Indian thought] in their vocabulary exceed in number those of any other form of intellectual belief. No language of ancient or modern times contains more philosophical terms than Sanskrit. Indian thought arrives at subtleties of distinction so varied and acute that the uninitiated and unprepared reader may well receive the impression that Indian philosophers enjoy the use of half a dozen intellects instead of one. We are accustomed to the idea of scientists constructing artificial brains to effect calculations which neither a single individual nor a team of individuals devoting a lifetime to the task could hope to achieve. The elaborate system of certain Indian philosophers sometimes appears to be the product of such socially-constructed intellects.”

Yet another challenge in understanding the Gita is that in spite the culture that produced the Gita being philosophically highly advanced, it does not believe in philosophy! Yes, there a huge number of books written on Indian philosophy, but India has not really ever believed in philosophy. it might come to some as a surprise that there is actually no Indian word for philosophy. The word used in place of philosophy is darshana – and darshana is very different from philosophy. Darshana means perception, seeing, vision, from the Sanskrit root drsh or darsh, meaning to see. Philosophy is the product of thinking, of analytical and synthetic thought processes, whereas seeing is not.

A world renowned modern master once pointed out the difference between philosophy and darshana beautifully. Philosophy is, he said, like a man who is asleep, with his eyes closed and a bed sheet drawn over his head, the windows of his room closed, trying to understand and tell others what the morning is like – though he has never seen it. Whereas darshana is, said the master, waking up from sleep, throwing away the bed sheet, getting up and going to the windows and looking out – and seeing the glory of the morning with your own eyes, seeing the sun coming up in the east, hearing the morning sounds, smelling the morning air, watching the plants and trees dancing in the freshness of the new day, hearing the sounds of birds and animals, seeing people moving about, breathing in the fresh morning air and feeling the daybreak rush of energy and life in your veins. In the first case, in the case of philosophy, you are bound to be wrong because there is no way of understanding what the morning is without personally seeing it and in the second case you will always be right because you have seen it, experienced it, lived it as part of it, felt it in your veins.

The Gita is not interested in explaining to you intellectually what truth is, what your true nature is, what the nature of the world is, but helping you to experience it directly. The discussions of the Gita are not for helping you understand reality cerebrally but so that you experience it. It is like the finger pointing at the moon – say, someone pointing out the moon to you by saying that it is what you see between the two large eastern branches of a tree. The moon has nothing to do with the branches of any tree, a minute later the position of the moon would have changed, and even if the tree were not there, the moon would have been where it is. But the pointing out helps you see it. And the pointing out has just one purpose, just one meaning – so that you see it.

All darshana begins with a master’s experience and ends when the disciple sees what he has seen. Gita is Krishna’s attempt to help Arjuna see what he has seen, know what he has known, experience what he has experienced, live what he is living, and through Arjuna, help us do these. The Gita is not a book to be cerebrally understood, it is not something to be neatly arranged within our brain and then debated and discussed with others. So that is another challenge.

Speaking of the truth that the Gita points at, the Upanishads say yato vacho nivartante, apraapya manasa saha – it is something from which words return, having not reached, along with the mind. This truth that is the subject matter of the Gita is beyond words and even beyond the mind. It is not a bunch of concepts that can be expressed in words or understood by the mind. All words have to cease before we reach there. We have to go beyond the mind to reach there. Where the mind is, there is no way we can understand this truth. The mind is like an opaque glass which does not let the light of the truth in, it blocks it. When the mind becomes thin, translucent, almost completely transparent, then we get glimpses of the Gita’s truth. And then like the Upanishad rishi we cry out:

hiranmayena paatrena satyasya apihitam mukham

tat tvam pooshann-apavrnu satya-dharmaaya drshtave. Isha Up. 15

“The face of the Truth is hidden by a disk of pure gold. O Pooshan, Lord of the Sun, do you remove that so that I have the vision of Truth and Dharma.”

And so long as the mind is thick, filled with thoughts and ideas and concepts and images and memories and plans, there is no way we can know it.

It is this truth that the mind cannot comprehend and the senses cannot reach that we Gita is speaking about. And that forms another challenge.

Yet another challenge is that the Gita is a poem and poetry is suggestive and invariably means more than what it says. It is not like a thesis where each word means exactly one and only one thing.

Krishna, the teacher of the Gita, is a rebel who gives original meanings to the words he uses – meanings born of his own understanding of spirituality and meanings he revives from traditions that had more or less disappeared by his time.  Krishna uses terms like sannyasa, yoga and akarma in senses that were totally different from the sense in which they were understood in his days. He also rejects many of the spiritual practices that were very common in his days, like Vedic rituals for pleasing the gods, extreme forms of asceticism and so on. For instance, he says traigunya-vishayaa vedaah, nistraigunyo bhava arjuna – the Vedas deal with [the world of] the three gunas; go beyond the three gunas, Arjuna. He also uses terms like nishkama karma and akarma in highly technical senses, with meanings very different from the senses in which they were understood in his days.

The fact that a large number of us today are ‘Macaulay’s children’ whose minds have been trained to look down upon things of Indian origin, our awe of things that come from the west, that we tend to think and speak in a language that has no roots in the Indian psyche and so on also pose challenges before us.

 

THE GITA AND PATRATA

Krishna and Arjuna had been together much of their life – they were friends, cousins and brothers-in-law and yet Krishna never taught Arjuna the Gita until the situation in the battlefield arose. That is because the wisdom of the Gita is not for us until we are ready for it. All people at all times are not eligible for its teachings – its teachings can be dangerous for those who are not ready for it and in the hands of such people, it can be dangerous for others too.

Learning the Gita also requires a certain maturity that comes from living the life of the world – a life based on the belief that the fulfillment of what Abraham Maslow calls physical and physiological needs, safety and security needs, acceptance and belongingness needs and esteem needs can give us contentment, can make our lives fulfilled. From a slightly higher standpoint, we may include even self-actualization needs in this group.

While everyone at all levels can learn valuable lessons from the Gita, it is only after realizing that the life of the world of actions do not give us what we are ultimately seeking that we become qualified for the teachings of the Gita that take us to the higher dimensions of life. After the realization through personal experience that what we are searching for is the uncreated and that the uncreated cannot be the result of actions.

Also, it is only when we become ready to do prapatti, surrender, to the guru, as Arjuna does in the battlefield when he tells Krishna in the second chapter of the Gita shishyaste'ham shaadhi maam twaam prapannam – I am your disciple. Protect me, for I seek refuge in you – that we become ready for the highest teachings of the Gita.

 

KRISHNA’S SPIRITUAL REVOLUTION

The Gita teaches the path to lasting good, the ultimate good. And the path to achieve that, as traditionally understood is the path of nivritti, withdrawal from all other activities, from the outer journey, and devoting all your energies and time exclusively to the inner journey by living a life of renunciation, sannyasa. Perhaps the most revolutionary teaching of Krishna in the Gita is that we need not do anything special for travelling on that path, that we need not do anything other than what we are doing now, that what we are doing at this moment itself can take us to that goal, the ultimate universal goal, the goal that every human being is seeking nisshreyasa, a word that means freedom from all bondages, including the bondage to the ego, to our life scripts, to time itself.

Krishna says that whatever we are doing at the moment, whether it is fighting a war as Arjuna is doing, or administering a kingdom or farming or tending cattle, or service to others could all equally become the path of that journey, just as meditation and prayer are.

As Krishna teaches it, the supervising, planning and organizing that an executive does, his actions of decision making, controlling, representing, consulting and administering, can all become spiritual paths leading him to the ultimate good, nisshreyasa. Marketing his products can become the spiritual path to a marketing executive, selling vegetables from a pushcart his spiritual path to a street vendor, tending cows his spirituality to a cowherd, cooking a meal for a cook, driving car for a driver, mowing the lawn for a gardener, chopping wood for a woodcutter, dancing for a dancer, painting for a painter, weaving cloth for a weaver, weaving baskets for a basket maker all can lead to the ultimate when done with the right mindset and understanding.  

India speaks of the butcher Dharmavyadha using butchering as his spiritual path, the prostitute Bindumati transforming her work into her spiritual path – and Krishna would approve of all these. And Krishna does not hesitate to declare that openly: sve sve karmany abhiratah samsiddhim labhate narah – each man achieves the highest by engaging in his own karma. [BG 18.45]

For Krishna what you is not the important thing, but how you do it.  After all he is teaching Arjuna in the Gita how to transform the battles in the warfield themselves into his spiritual path – slaughtering enemies can become his spiritual path for a soldier, for a kshatriya, if that cannot be avoided, if there is no other means left.  

Krishna calls this karma yoga, the miracle of transforming your karma into your yoga, whatever your karma is. Until his days, pravritti, actions in the world, and nivritti, withdrawal from the world, were two different paths. Krishna beautifully blended the two to form the path of karma yoga.  He combined pravritti and nivritti and called it by the ancient name of sannyasa, giving the new meaning of nivritti in pravritti to sannyasa – withdrawal while actively engaged in action, detachment while working with full commitment. He taught Arjuna that running away from karma is not sannyasa, but doing karma with a different mindset is. Krishna teaches that you do not have to do anything different, but only do the same things differently.

At the same time, Krishna does not forget that there are other paths to reach that goal too – after all the spiritual search has been man’s greatest adventure and over millennia humanity has developed innumerable paths to reach that goal. So Krishna gives us many paths to reach that goal – for no path is for all people. Each man’s journey has to begin from where he is now and for that reason there are innumerable paths leading to nisshreyasa and the Gita is a compendium of all these paths.

 

FINAL WORDS BEFORE WE BEGIN

One last thing before we begin the discussion of the second chapter of the Bhagavad Gita.

The Bhagavad Gita is not a book that tells you what to do and what not to do. It is not a book of prescriptions or proscriptions. It is a book about awakening, about seeing the truth face to face, and about living rooted in that awakening. It is a book that leads you to enlightenment, in the light of which you will be able to decide for yourself what is right and what is wrong, what to do and what not to do, how to live and how not to live. So if you are seeking readymade solutions for your problems in the Gita you might be disappointed. It will give you light in which you can see things as they are, and you will know what to do with each problem facing you. It will also show you many paths to walk on, and will tell you where each path will take you, and ask you to choose for yourself as Krishna does at the end of the Gita by telling Arjuna:

iti te jnaanam aakhyaatam guhyaad guhyataram mayaa
vimrshyaitad ashesheṇa yathechchhasi tathaa kuru

“Thus, have I revealed to you knowledge that is more hidden than the deepest secret. Think over it deeply and then do as you wish.”

The Gita is a book of freedom, not of bindings. It does not put you in shackles by saying do this and don’t do this, but removes all your shackles. It does not clip your wings, but shows you the sky and asks you to flutter your wings and soar.

Krishna believes that rather than fitting into the society as it is, with all its maladies and shallowness, we should change it. On his way to India, Pythagoras discovered in Egypt that people live as though in sleep. The Gita wants us to wake up ourselvss and then help others wake up.

Apart from leading individuals to the highest goal of life, the Gita can also help us create an enlightened society in which life will be meaningful rather than meaningless, people will have something genuine to live for rather than feel life and work have no meaning. With the help of the Gita, life can become a song of joy, a dance of celebration. It can create a society in which people will not be running madly all the time to reach where they know not, but will have time for their souls to catch up with them.

Gurudev Tagore sang:

Where the mind is without fear and the head held high;
Where knowledge is free;
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments by narrow domestic walls;
Where words come out from the depth of truth;
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection;
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way into the dreary desert sand of dead habit;
Where the mind is led forward by Thee into ever-widening thought and action;
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake!

The Gita can make not only our country but the entire world awaken into that heaven of freedom.

O0O


Saturday, July 18, 2020

Living Bhagavad Gita 024: The Miracle of Listening



A series of short articles on the Bhagavad Gita for people living and working in our volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous times filled with stress and fear. This scripture born in a battlefield teaches us how to face our challenges, live our life fully, achieve excellence in whatever we do and find happiness, peace and contentment.

[Continued from the previous post.]
One of the fascinating things about the Gita chapter we are about to finish discussing is that Krishna says just a single sentence of five words here: partha pashya etaan samavetaan kuroon – Arjuna, see these assembled kurus. After that he remains totally silent, listening to Arjuna. As Arjuna passes through various stages of confusion, frustration, depression, melancholy and finally reaches the depths of his vishada, Krishna pays full attention to him. He speaks again only after Arjuna has collapsed in his chariot abandoning his bow and arrows at the end of the chapter and the next chapter begins. He gives Arjuna space to say all he wants to say without interrupting once. And after he has stopped speaking, Krishna provokes him to speak again, helping him to expresses anything more that might be lurking in the depths of his mind. This is like emptying a vessel and then pouring some water into it, shaking the vessel well and emptying it again to clean out anything that might have been still  be in it. As Krishna does so, Arjuna brings out the rest of his pain and agony and confusion from his inner depths, thus making his mind empty and receptive to Krishna’s teachings. That emptiness at the end of pouring out all that is in your mind is a requirement to receive the teachings of the Gita.
Very little of Gita can go into a crowded mind, which is the reason why we too must practice some sadhana for emptying the mind along with the study of the Gita, like a meditation. A few minutes of meditation every day and living the whole day meditatively will take us a long way. Living the whole day meditatively is not difficult because all you have to do is to focus completely on whatever you are doing. Meditation is focusing your attention on a single thing, whether it is your breath, abdominal movement, a mantra, a sound, an image or anything else.  In his classic The Miracle of Mindfulness, Thich Nhat Hanh speaks of transforming everyday actions like washing vessels into meditation by the simple practice of paying full attention to them. 
One of the most famous Zen stories is about a university professor who went to meet a Zen master to learn Zen from him. While the professor began introducing himself, the master ordered tea. A disciple brought tea and the master began pouring the tea into a cup while the professor talked about the researches he has done, the researches he is engaged in at the moment, his future research plans and so on. Listening quietly without saying a word, the Zen master kept pouring the tea into the cup which had by then become full and had started spilling over. Suddenly the professor noticed this and said, “Master, the cup is full. No more will go in!”
And the master stopped and said, “You are like this cup, professor. You are so full of yourself that no Zen will go in now. Empty yourself and come back.”
Without emptying ourselves, we cannot receive wisdom. Wisdom is given only to those who have become silent inside and not to those with crowded minds. Krishna is allowing Arjuna to go on talking so that his mind becomes empty and receptive to what he has to say.
O0O
There is another reason why Krishna listens to Arjuna attentively without interrupting. The greatest thing anyone can do for a man who is in pain and grief is to listen to him. Being heard is healing.  Just the fact that someone is listening to us attentively, the fact that someone feels what we have to say is important, will have a positive effect on us, as anyone who has ever wanted to talk to someone and has found someone to listen to him knows.
I remember my days as the principal of a large junior college. One day a girl student in her teens came to me weeping, her whole body shaking, the power of each sob sending violent tremors through her whole body. I seated her conformably on a sofa in my chamber and gave her plenty of time to relax and catch her breath. It was only after quite some time that she started sharing her problem. It took me a long time to get the whole picture from her as she shared her pain in words interspersed with periods of sobbing.
This young girl was extremely beautiful and very sweet. One of her plain looking teachers could not tolerate her beauty or the fact that all the boys liked her. So she began insulting her in class, finding fault with her for everything, calling her an idiot for the smallest errors she made and also saying things like she has no interest in studies but was interested only in drawing boys to her, she was a trap and a danger to the boys and bad example to other girls. The teacher went to the extent of calling the young girl a slut in the classroom.
It took me more than an hour of more or less silent listening to put her at ease and then to assure her she would be fine, nothing would happen to her. I had instructed my secretary who sat just outside my chamber not to let anyone come in so that I could listen to her uninterrupted, paying full attention. I can’t say she was healed of her pain by the time she left my room, but she had certainly become relaxed, with even a gentle smile appearing on her face as she was thanked me and left.
Krishna listens with complete attention to whatever Arjuna has to say because listening with complete attention is in itself healing.
By the way, listening with complete attention is also the greatest compliment you can give anyone. We all need attention – that is one of the greatest people truths.  
O0O
The following passage is from Brenda Shoshanna’s beautiful book Zen Miracles: Finding Peace in an Insane World, a book that I have used as a text in a course called Zen and the Executive Mind that I taught for several years in one of the top business schools of India, XLRI School of Business and Human Resources.    
“A Zen student, Leila, went to the beach for the weekend. After a hectic week she looked forward to peace, to the smell of the ocean, to the sand dunes. There was a woman cleaning in the guest house Leila was staying at. This woman, Frieda, sang very loud love songs in Spanish as she swept the floors. In addition, she was noisy and clumsy.

“As usual, Leila woke up early in the morning and wanted to do zazen. She tidied her room, and placed a cushion on the floor to sit on. Just as she sat down on it she heard a bang against the door. Frieda was sweeping outside and had knocked the door with her broom. She was also singing loudly, “My heart’s breaking, breaking today.”

“Leila sat on the cushion, listening to the shrill song. “What will I do without you?” Frieda kept wailing. Finally, Leila got up, opened the door and called, “Frieda, can you be a little more quiet?”

“Frieda didn’t fully understand English and kept right on singing.

“Leila went back to sit down again, but not only did the song get louder, the broom started banging her door consistently.  Finally, she got up from the cushion wondering what was wrong with the woman. Negative thoughts started to brew but thanks to years of zazen, she caught herself. “Stop it,” she said to the dark mind that was forming. Leila realized that when we want to be apart from something, it clings to us; when we want to be too close, it runs away.

“She opened the door and went out of the room. The minute Frieda saw her, she flew over, standing no more than two inches away. It seemed she had taken a great liking to Leila. Leila turned to go outside in the street, and Frieda followed along.  “Where are you going?” she said. “To the beach,” Leila said. Frieda grinned. “Me too. Going along.”

“As they walked down the dirt road to the ocean, Frieda kept humming and Leila resisted, trying to shut her out. She started concentrating on other things. Then the humming turned into loud singing again. Leila focused on the delicious salt air and took deep gulps of it. The singing got louder still. Whatever Leila did to block it out, it only got louder. Then, suddenly Master Rinzai’s words came to her: “If we master each circumstance, then whatever we do is the truth.” How am I going to master this? she wondered.  They arrived at the beach with Frieda singing relentlessly.”
“When they got to the sand, Leila spread out a blanket and sat down; Frieda planted herself right beside her again. As Leila watched the waves of the ocean roll up on the shore, she suddenly stopped pushing Frieda away, and fell into zazen. She stopped wanting things to be different. She stopped wanting quiet time alone at the beach. This was the circumstance she was in now, hearing Frieda sing over and over that her heart was breaking...”
As we shall see, this incident Brenda Shoshanna shares is about listening, but it is about other things too. It is about accepting things as they are, people as they are, life as it is, and many more things. As a practitioner of Zen,
Leila is trying to use every situation that life presents as an opportunity for practicing Zen. Let’s continue with Shoshanna’s narration. Something beautiful happens now. 
“Frieda was swaying as she sang, and Leila found herself swaying as well. As the two of them sat there swaying, Frieda’s voice became softer. Leila turned and looked at Frieda. Tears were pouring down her face.

“Frieda said, “You, my mamma. Missing my mamma.” Leila finally understood that Frieda was missing her mother, who was far away. She must have reminded Frieda of her mother.  Frieda was sitting there crying and in a moment Leila started crying as well. She was also missing her mother, who had died a year ago. The two of them sat there crying on the blanket together until Leila turned and gave Frieda a hug. Soon the crying subsided, the singing subsided—they were simply sitting together, listening to the sound of the waves.”

What a beautiful experience! Leila could have rejected Frieda, shouted at her, instead she accepts her, listens to her attentively. A woman in great pain and loneliness is consoled. The pain she had been storing inside her suffocating her melts and comes out in the form of her tears and an amazing relationship is formed between the two women who were strangers just a few minutes ago!
Listening can do miracles. Paying attention to others can do miracles.

Unfortunately in today’s world no one has time to listen to others! All of us are in such hurry and we all have so much to say! How can we listen to others then?

O0O

I remember a sad story reported by newspapers several years ago.

As the parents were getting the little baby ready for school she was resisting and saying she did not want to go. Well, that was nothing unusual, so they continued. But as they put her foot in one of her shoes she started screaming but they ignored that too. Just the daily drama taken to just another level, they thought. They tied up the shoe laces after putting the other foot in the other shoe and hurried her out as they heard the school bus coming.

The baby kept screaming in the bus and then continued crying aloud in the school too for two more hours. It is only then one of the teachers noticed blood was draining from her face and her body was slowly turning blue while the child kept up with the screaming which had by now become weak. Soon the baby collapsed in a swoon and the teacher loosened her uniform and removed her shoes. It was then she saw it – there was a scorpion inside the child’s shoe, still alilve! It was the scorpion bite that had made her scream in the first place and now her foot was all swollen up and the poison had spread to other parts of her body too.  As I remember the news said the poor baby died of the scorpion poisoning.

Just the other day I saw a sad You Tube video about a little child fighting with her mother insisting that she did not want to go to school. The mother asked her why and she said it was no fun, they didn’t allow her to play, it was only study and study all the time, and you had to sit without moving and do all the teacher asked you to do. The mother asked her if they don’t sing songs in school, if they don’t dance and she said it was just abcd and numbers and nothing else. The baby kept saying she did not want to go to school, wept, begged her mother not to send her to school. As you watched the baby’s helpless frustration, tears welled up in your eyes and you felt it difficult to breathe. But I felt that was not how the mother saw it – I could hear her laughing at what the baby was saying, as though she found it all amusing rather than painful.

I know perhaps mothers today have no choice, such is what education has become, particularly in India with such high premium placed on education and with so many first and second generation learners. I remembered all those lectures on Rousseau I gave to future teachers in a College of Education where I taught for many years. Speaking about the right kind of education, Rousseau said “education practices the art of delay,” meaning we must delay sending children to schools as much as possible. The father of modern education also said the best education is negative education, meaning we much give children as little book education as possible, and instead send them back to nature for natural education. Sadly all those ideas have been wiped away by the tides of time and what we see today all around us is little babies going to school bent under the weight of heavy backpacks. They look like mountain climbers with huge trekking bags. Education should be pleasurable, said Rousseau, but that is not exactly what we see when we look at our schools. Even then shouldn’t parents at least give a sympathetic ear to children when they say they do not want to go to school?

In his book Is the American Dream Killing You? Paul Stiles speaks of how we have all become servants of an all-powerful entity called Market and how that entity has made in the short span of just two generations joint families disappear from the face of the earth. True, joint families had their own problems, but they were wonderful places for children to grow up in, with many generations living together, and several children of near ages growing up together and there was always someone to listen to you when you wanted to talk. Today instead of parents and grandparents, it is the paid caregivers at the day care centers who look after you. More than Anything Else in the World is a powerful, award winning Brazilian movie I once saw in a film festival. It talked about the loneliness of a little girl growing up with her single mother who works nine to five in modern Rio de Janeiro and the hell life has become for her and the mother.

Much of the insanity and violence in the world today is because no one has time to listen to children in their most important years of growing up.  

O0O

One of the greatest leadership skills is listening skill, some would even say it is the greatest leadership skill. A story from third century China tells us of King Ts’ao taking his son Prince Ta’i to Pan Ku, the best guru in the country who lived near the Ming Li forest. The king requested Pan Ku to give the prince the best possible education as the future ruler of the country.

When the king left, Pan Ku turned to the young boy and told him, “Go the forest and build a small hut there for yourself. Live in that hut for a full year listening to the sound of the forest. Come back to me after the year is over.” The boy was completely confused by the order. He had expected to be taught strategic leadership skills, people skills, planning skills, the vision and mission of a king and all else he would need tomorrow as a ruler. Instead he was being asked to go and live in the forest all alone listening to the sound of the forest. But since there was no one he could complain to since his father himself had left him with the guru, he quietly went and lived in the forest as he was told to. He listened to all the sounds of the forest – the rustle of leaves, the chirping of crickets, the buzzing of bees, the roar of lions, the song of birds, the laughter of hyenas, the chattering of the monkeys... He waited impatiently for the year to be over and then went back to the master.

“Did you listen to the sound of the forest?” asked the master and the prince said, “Yes, master.” And when Pan Ku asked him what he had heard, he started naming the different sounds he had heard. As the list grew, the guru’s face began growing darker and darker and when he finished, the guru shouted, “Back to the forest. Come back after one more year.”

The furious and frustrated young man went back to the forest and for a while continued listening. But he had already spent an entire year listening just to the sounds of the forest and there was nothing new to hear. Eventually he gave up and spent his time just relaxing under trees, walking by streams and lying in shades. He was no more trying to listen to forest sounds but had surrendered to a forest dweller’s life, became part of the forest, no more separate from it but one with it.

And then one day it happened. He heard something he had never heard before. The sound of the grass growing, the sound of the trees drinking up water with their roots, the sound of green leaves yellowing, green fruits ripening, plants flowering, seasons changing. He had goose bumps all over, great joy spurted from within him as water from an underground spring, and bathed in this bliss he ran to the guru, without even waiting for the completion of the year. The guru took one look at him and then hugged him, telling him he had heard that he wanted him to hear, he had heard the sound of the forest. Pan Ku sent him back to his father with his blessings, telling him his education was complete, he would be a great king like his father.

What the boy had heard was the sound of silence – it is in silence that the grass grows, it is in silence that fruits ripen, it is in silence that seasons change. He was able to listen to the sound of silence because he himself had grown silent inside by surrendering to life, accepting it without resisting it, and by totally relaxing, letting go. And with the birth of that inner silence, he had become capable of listening – for the first time in his life. He could now listen not only to what was spoken, but also to the unspoken. He could not only listen to sounds but also to silence. Intelligence had been awakened in him, because the secret of intelligence is inner silence. Sensitivity had been awakened in him, because the secret of sensitivity is inner silence. Imagination had been awakened in him, because the secret of imagination is inner silence. Love had been awakened in him, because only with a silent mind can you really love others.

His education was now truly complete. Everything that he did will now have the quality of excellence. When he touched things, they would sparkle. When he spoke, people would run to fulfill his wishes. He would be surrounded by an aura of tranquility and stillness. His energy would now be inexhaustible. He would now be what Tibet called wang thang, a center of serene power. He would see beauty in the most ordinary things. He would radiate love. He would no more have to manipulate people because his least wish would be a command for them.

That is what happens when you become silent inside.

Says Zen: To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders.

O0O

Learning to listen is a great blessing on us. It is also a blessing on others. When you give your attention to others, they are healed, made whole.
Doctors need to listen to their patients, says the latest discoveries in medicine. It is as much the doctor who heals as the medicine.

Parents need to listen. Teachers need to listen. Husbands and wives need to listen.
Leaders need to listen.  It is only then that they can understand the private hells within peoples and efficiently motivate them; coach, mentor and guide them and build effective teams. It has been said by experts that leadership is 80% listening and 20% talking – probably the opposite of what is widely practiced.  

Amazing is the power of loving attention. It transforms people. If you have seen the movie Munnabhai MBBS, you know the instant transformation that happens when Munna pays loving attention to Maksood Bhai, you know the secret of Anand Bhai’s metamorphosis from a living dead man to the narrator of the movie. Like love that transforms both the lover and the loved, attention paid to others too transforms both them and you. 

Krishna listens to Arjuna and encourages him to speak more and that opens the door to wonderful teachings we call the Bhagavad Gita.

The Gita teaches us what exactly we are seeking and why we seek it. The Gita helps us discover the meaning of life, shows us the only path worth travelling for our own good and the good of the world. The Gita teaches us the difference between shreyas and preyas. The Gita helps the river of our life to flow towards the ocean as it should and not towards dreary deserts, to borrow an expression from Gurudev Tagore. The Gita can make life what it is meant to be – an utsava, a celebration, a festival,

Thus ends Chapter One of the Bhagavad Gita.

Shri krishnarpanam astu! Tavaiva vastu govinda tubhyam eva samarpaye! 

O0O


Saturday, July 11, 2020

Living Bhagavad Gita 023: Journey to the East



A series of short articles on the Bhagavad Gita for people living and working in our volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous times filled with stress and fear. This scripture born in a battlefield teaches us how to face our challenges, live our life fully, achieve excellence in whatever we do and find happiness, peace and contentment.

[Continued from the previous post.]


The name given to the first chapter of the Gita is Arjuna Vishada Yoga – the Yoga of Arjuna’s Vishada. The word vishada is translated variously as melancholy, sorrow, grief, depression, despondency, sadness, misery and so on.  
We just saw in the last article how Arjuna surrendered to melancholy, dropped his bow and arrows and collapsed into his chariot telling Krishna he will not fight, he finds no point in fighting and killing, no point in winning the kingdom, no point in pleasures or even in life itself. Kim no rajyena govinda, kim bhogair jeevitena vaa, he asks: “What good is the kingdom, Krishna, and what good are pleasures or life itself?”
All over the world today there is a lot of discussion about depression which is fast spreading and assuming the form of a wild fire that can consume everything. I was part of the faculty team giving an intensive training programme for doctors at XLRI School of Business and Human Resources and we were having a pre-programme dinner when the topic of depression came up. Several professors felt depression is fast becoming the most dangerous problem the world is facing today with a large number of lives claimed every day. This was of course in the days before the covid-19 pandemic.  
Bright young people seem to be particularly susceptible to depression. In his bestselling book The Happiness Advantage: The Seven Principles of Positive Psychology, Shawn Achor speaks about depression in Harvard University where happiness was the subject of his research for several years. Achor says “despite all its magnificent facilities, a wonderful faculty, and a student body made up of some of America’s (and the world’s) best and brightest, it is home to many chronically unhappy young men and women. In 2004, for instance, a Harvard Crimson poll found that as many as 4 in 5 Harvard students suffer from depression at least once during the school year, and nearly half of all students suffer from depression so debilitating they can’t function.” Shawn Achor then goes on to say that “This unhappiness epidemic is not unique to Harvard. A Conference Board survey released in January of 2010 found that only 45 percent of workers surveyed were happy at their jobs, the lowest in 22 years of polling. Depression rates today are ten times higher than they were in 1960. Every year the age threshold of unhappiness sinks lower, not just at universities but across the nation. Fifty years ago, the mean onset age of depression was 29.5 years old. Today, it is almost exactly half that: 14.5 years old.”
Speaking about depression, the Himalayan monk Om Swami says in his book When All Is Not Well: Depression and Sadness: “Depression isn’t just sadness. It is emptiness, it is misery. It is pain and nothingness at once. When you are truly depressed, you lack the ability or will to cheer yourself up. No one just ‘has depression’. You suffer from it.”
Continuing, Om Swami explains what depression feels like. “You will wake at 5, 6, maybe 7 a.m., feeling as though you had only just fallen asleep... If you don’t have to be somewhere, you could lie in bed for another three hours; too tired, too miserable and pathetic to crawl out of your bed. Or maybe you will sleep until 1 p.m., because it’s so much easier to sleep through most of the day than actually live it, and you’re so unbelievably tired anyway. You will push through the day, knowing that every hour will be a struggle and not knowing how you will feel tomorrow. People will ask what is wrong, and you will simply smile and say, ‘Nothing, I’m just tired.’ ...You will spend your days not only lost in the haze of depression, but your mind will be so consumed with these thoughts of escaping and self-destruction that you think you could explode…”
But the important question is why so many people are feeling depressed today. Why is depression spreading across the world like a deadly epidemic today?
The reasons are not too difficult to find. For one thing, our life has become too fast. We are obsessed with speed – in real life as well as in virtual life. We have become intolerant of slowness. And stillness? Of course, we have grown strangers to it. We have forgotten that all that is beautiful in life comes from stillness. Creativity comes from stillness. Intuition comes from stillness. Art and music come from stillness. The essence of dance is not movement but the stillness that is its substratum, from which arises and into which it goes back. All inventions and discoveries are made in moments of stillness. Intuition comes from stillness, insights come from stillness, healing comes from stillness. Medical professionals have long recognized that silence plays an important part in healing. For instance, the experience of even a little real silence can produce physiological changes that neutralize the effects of stress.“When you are still, you find that your perception of life is at its purest,” says Ron Rothbun in his book The Way Is Within.
We are all familiar with the story of Archimedes who ran through the streets of Athens shouting eureka, eureka. The Athenian ruler had given him an assignment. Someone had gifted the ruler a crown and he wanted to find out if the crown was of pure gold or some alloy had been mixed with the gold. The specific gravity of gold was known then, but no one knew how to measure the mass of an irregular object like the crown. Archimedes was the best scientist of the day and he struggled for weeks to find a solution to the problem. If only there was a way to measure the mass of the crown! Then you could decide whether the crown was pure gold or not.
Eventually Archimedes gave up his struggles admitting defeat and sank into a tub for a relaxed bath. It was then, in that moment when there were not struggles in his mind and the mind had become still with his acceptance of defeat, that he noticed water spilling over from the tub as his body sank into the tub. That very instant insight was born, a great discovery happened: the mass of water that spilled out was equal to the mass of his body that had submerged in the water. The quantity of water that flows out when a substance is immersed in a vessel full of water is equal to the mass of the substance.
In that still moment, his problem had been solved and climbing out of the tub he ran through the streets of Athens shouting that word that has now become part of every language in the world: eureka, eureka!
We all have had the experience of something, a name, we had forgotten coming back to us the moment we give up the struggles and the mind becomes still.
All science and all technology is the product of still moments. All that is precious to humanity are products of inner stillness, of the mind is that is empty of restless thoughts. The saying that the empty mind is the devil’s workshop is completely wrong. The empty mind is God’s workshop!
Indian culture says the universe is born of God’s empty mind. The Taittiriya Upanishad says, “Sa tapo’tapyata. Sa tapas taptvaa idam sarvam asrjata. Yadidam kincha.” “He did tapas. Having done tapas, he created all this. He created all that exists.” It is from the mind of God that has become empty because of tapas that the universe comes into being.      
There is story told about the world famous painter Raphael and an unknown woodcutter. One morning as the woodcutter was going to the forest to cut wood, he saw Raphael sitting by a lake, lazily picking up pebbles and dropping them into the lake. The woodcutter shook his head in disapproval – what a waste of time! – and went on his way. As the woodcutter was returning home with his load of firewood, he saw Raphael still sitting there picking up pebbles and throwing them into the lake! What an idiot, he thought! I have done a whole day’s work and the moron is still sitting there and throwing pebbles into the lake!
We know today that such a woodcutter existed because of Raphael, one of the greatest painters the world has known.
In the ancient Indian tradition, in fact all over the world, we began everything with a few moments of silence, of mental stillness, of prayer. But today stillness, and even slowness, is looked down upon. It is one of the greatest casualties of the age of speed.      
The virtues of slowness are unlimited, says Carl Honore in his book In praise of slowness. In his book Slowing Down to the Speed of Life, Richard Carlson says more or less the same thing. And it is that slowness that we have rejected in favour of speed! Faster, faster, ever faster, says our culture!
Slowing down and experiencing stillness is one of our basic needs – it is as essential as breathing. Our brains go completely haywire unless we experience slowness and stillness on a regular basis. Which is exactly what is not happening today. And that is taking a heavy toll on young minds today, especially gifted young minds, leading to depression and all that depression leads to. The philosophy aaraam hai haraam has to go. Laziness is bad, sluggishness is bad, sloth and apathy are bad, but relaxation is not. It is the most healing thing most of us know, apart from sleep. In fact sleep is a form of relaxation too. The second highest form of relaxation, after meditation which is the highest form of relaxation in existence.
We need to spend more time ‘plucking daisies’, we need to spend more time climbing mountains, we need to spend more time unfocused and in ‘purposeless’ activities, like Raphael picking up pebbles and throwing them into the lake. We need to give our souls time to catch up with us. That is the medicine for fighting the insane obsession with speed that drives us away from our own calm inner centre.  
A European explorer was in the Amazon forests, exploring the flora and fauna there. He had hired a supervisor and the supervisor had hired native people to help him in his work. One day passed the explorer and the natives hurrying from one thing to another, then another day and then yet another day. On the fourth day when the explorer was ready to start he found not one native was ready. When enquired, the supervisor gave him an incredibly beautiful reply. He told the explorer: they are giving time for their souls to catch up with them!
We all need to give time for our souls to catch up with us.  
One of the most beautiful Chuang Tzu stories ever says:
The prince discovered when he returned from the top of the mountain that he had mislaid the Priceless Pearl up on the mountain.
He sent his generals and their armies to search for it, but they could not find it. He employed Huang-Ti, the vehement debater, to find the Pearl, but Huang-Ti was unable to find it. He sent his skilled gardeners and his artisans to find it, but they too came home empty-handed.
Finally, in despair, having tried everyone else, he sent Purposeless to the mountain, and Purposeless found the pearl immediately.
"How odd it is", mused the Prince, "that it was Purposeless who found it!"
We are all birds meant to fly in the open sky. Those who have known the truth, the Upanishad rishis for instance, call us amritasya putraah – children of the Immortal, each one of us a divine spark. The Mundaka Upanishad tells us: yathaa sudeeptaat paavakaad visphulingaah sahasrashah prabhavante saroopaah, tathaa aksharaad vividhaah somya bhaavaah prajaayante tatra chaivaapi yanti: Just as sparks in their thousands are born from a roaring fire, each of the same nature as the fire itself, so do, dear one, beings come forth from the Imperishable One and return to It. [Mu.Up.2.1]   
No, we are not meant to spend our lives hopping about on the ground searching for worms but to stretch out our wings, soar up and enjoy the bliss of the boundless skies – the boundless skies of consciousness. We are meant for the bhooma, the vast, and not for the alpa, the small. The owl will be satisfied with the rotting body of a mouse, but not the phoenix which will touch no food other than certain sacred fruits and drink only from the clearest springs. The chakora lives on moonbeams, says Indian mythology, and will touch nothing else. The way man lives today is like the phoenix being forced to live on rotten mice and the chakora being forced to live on the food that pigs eat.
By and large, man has forgotten the higher. We have become flotsams with no roots in our spiritual selves. We are living not the philosophy of the rising son as we did in the past but the philosophy of the setting sun. Frustration and depression are bound to be there.        
O0O
As we saw, the vishada that happened to Arjuna in the battlefield is called by different names such as melancholy, sorrow, grief, depression, despondency, sadness, misery and so on
But there is a different name for it. India calls it vairagya, dispassion, and considers it sacred. Vairagya is the first step in the journey to the east, the journey to the land where the sun rises, the journey to the source of all light. Light as bright as the light of a thousand suns, light before which all other lights pale.
There is mantra that is traditionally chanted when we do arati, ritually show burning lamps before a sacred idol. Na tatra sooryo bhaati na chandrataarakam nemaa vidyuto bhaanti kutoyam agnih; tam eva bhaantam anubhaaati saravam tasya bhaasaa sarvam idam vibhaati, says the mantra. “The sun does not shine there, nor the moon or the stars. How then will this fire? That alone shines and everything else shines after it, reflecting its light.” The journey to that source of all light begins with what Arjuna is experiencing now and that is why India considers vairagya sacred.   
This is something that happens only to sensitive people. Much of the time the kind of questions Arjuna asks, the feelings Arjuna feels, come to us from a great shower of blessing that descends upon us. It is ishwra-anugraha, the grace of God, says India.
The rishi of the Svetashvatara Upanishad declares boldly and unhesitatingly:
vedaaham etaṃ puruṣhaṃ mahaantam aaditya-varṇaṃ tamasaḥ parastaat;
tam eva viditvaa atimṛtyum eti naanyaḥ panthaa vidyate'yanaaya. Sv. Up. 3.8
“I know the Great Purusha, He who is luminous like the sun and beyond darkness. Only by knowing Him does one go beyond death. There is no other path worth travelling!” 
Vairagya is the invitation to begin our journey on the only path worth travelling.
It is not only Arjuna who has grace showered on him as he stands in the chariot driven by Krishna in the middle of the two armies in Kurukshertra, but all of us, the entire humanity. Because it is in response to this vairagya he felt that the Bhagavad Gita was born on a shukla paksha ekadashi day, on the eleventh day of the bright lunar fortnight in the month of Margashirsha, more than five thousand and one hundred years ago. 
A well known story from the Mahabharata says that both Arjuna and Duryodhana went to meet Krishna seeking his help before the war began. Duryodhana was the first to enter Krishna’s bed chamber and he went and took a seat by the head of the bed. A few moments later Arjuna entered the chamber and he too could have gone and taken a seat at the head of the bed as Duryodhana had done. Instead, he went and stood at Krishna’s feet. When Krishna opened his eyes a few moments later it was naturally Arjuna who was standing at the foot of the bed that he saw first. As we all know, it was on him that Krishna’s grace fell in the form of his presence with him during the war and as his driver.
Krishna is grace. The greatest possible grace! With Krishna on your side, the impossible becomes possible. With Krishna on your side miracles happen. Mookam karoti vaachaalam pangum landhayate girim, yat-kripaa tam aham vande parama-ananda-maadhavam, says one of the shlokas traditionally chanted before the study of the Gita: “I bow down to Krishna, who is supreme bliss itself, with whose grace the speechless become eloquent and the lame crosses over mountains.”
The choice that Arjuna made in Krishna’s bedchamber, rejecting the Narayani Sena, rejecting the power of a mighty army and choosing just Krishna, Krishna’s grace, it is that choice that is now showering on him in the form of the Bhagavad Gita. All we have to do is to make that choice, everything else happens by itself. That is why Krishna concludes his teachings in the Gita by saying:
sarvadharmaan parityajya maam ekam sharanam vraja; aham twaa sarvapaapebhyo mokshayishyaami maa shuchah BG 18.66
“Abandoning all dharmas, take refuge in me alone; I will liberate you from all sins. Have no grief.”   
Duryodhana missed Krishna’s grace throughout his life. After the war was over, Gandhari curses Krishna saying he could have and should have helped her son but did not. But grace can shower on you only when you are open to it. If a pot remains upside down when the sky showers rains, not a drop will go inside even if an entire season passes. In fact, the only thing you need to deserve grace is openness to it, receptivity to it, which is what Duryodhana did not have.  There were a thousand occasions in his life when he could have taken refuge in Krishna, but rejects every single one of them.
There is a famous Indian story about a beggar who was crossing a bridge, walking with a stick in hand. The story says that Goddess Parvati takes pity on the poor beggar and requests Shiva to bless him with wealth. Shiva says there is no point because even if he gives wealth to him, he will not get it because he is not open to his blessing. But the heart of the goddess is the heart of a mother and she insists that the man be given wealth. Shiva agrees and a treasure chest appears on the bridge. The moment the chest appears on the bridge, the beggar has a thought: “I am young now and I can see well, but what will happen to me when I grow old and lose my eyesight? I must practice walking blind right from now.”  With that thought, he closes he eyes and walking with the help of the stick crosses the rest of the bridge, missing the treasure completely!
Throughout his life Duryodhana behaved like that beggar.
Whereas Arjuna chose Krishna lifetimes ago. The Mahabharata tells us they have been friends across lifetimes, meditating in the Himalayas together.
There is a mantra in the Mundaka Upanishad that my teacher Swami Dayananda Saraswati was very fond of. During the years when I was in the Sandeepany Gurukula and learning timeless Indian wisdom from him, he must have quoted this mantra hundreds of times.
pareekshya lokaan karmachitaan braahmano nirvedam aayaan naastyakrtah krtena tadvijnanartham sa gurum evabhigacched samitpaanih shrotriyam brahmanishtham. Mu.Up.1.2.12 
“Having examined all in the world that is gained through actions, after attaining nirveda and realizing that the uncreated cannot be achieved through actions, let [him who has thus become] a brahmana, approach with samit in hand a guru who is learned [in the traditional spiritual lore] and rooted in the Brahman.”
The soul of the entire Indian spiritual culture could be found in that one mantra. Before approaching the guru and being qualified for his grace, we must developed nirveda towards all that can be attained through our own power, through our actions. Nirveda means vairagya – what Arjuna is experiencing at the moment. It is when this vairagya is born in your heart that you become a brahmana – one whose entire focus is on  attaining the Brahman, one whose concentration now is only on attaining the spiritual goal. And then he should go to his guru with samit in hand. Samit is kindling used in sacrificial fire. Carrying that to your guru is the symbol of your joyful willingness to serve the master.
Duryodhana is still far from the nirveda the Upanishad talks about. He is not willing to surrender to Krishna and therefore is not ready for the grace. He has not yet developed what makes you a brahmana ­– the all consuming urge to abandon everything else and walk the path of shreyas to reach the land of the ultimate good, the land of light, having reached which you never return – yad gatvaa na nivartante. He is still very much with the loka of wealth, power, position, sensual pleasures and so on.
Arjuna has developed that urge and he is ready. That is why he is asking, “What good is the kingdom, Krishna, and what good are pleasures or life itself?” The vishada he is experiencing at the moment is the clear sign of that.
All vishadas, depressions, are not bad, some are good. Some can take you to the higher. They come to you from divine grace. With them begins our journey to the east, the greatest journey we will ever make.
O0O